Midsummer Night’s Dream Urban Translator
| WHEN SHAKESPEARE SAYS: | HE MEANS: |
| Behold! | Yo, check it. |
| What’s the news with thee? | What up, dawg? |
| O cross! (See also: O spite! O hell!) | Bummermuffins |
| O me! | Fail |
| Nay | No |
| No, no! | Hellz no |
| Hail! | Holla |
| Good morrow friends. | Holla my honeys |
| Set your heart at rest | Chillax |
| O monstrous! O strange! | No way. That be whack |
| Mine ear is much enamored of thy note; So is mine eye enthralled to thy shape | You da bomb diggety. |
| So sorrow’s heaviness doth heavier grow | Sucks to suck |
| Why are you grown so rude? | What’s your damage? |
| I jest to Oberon and make him smile | I hella funny guy |
| And then the whole quire hold their hips and laugh, and waxen in their mirth and neeze and swear | #LOL |
| A merrier hour was never wasted here | That party was off the hook |
| This falls out better than I could devise | Sweeeeeet! |
| Thou speakest aright | Fo’ shizzle my nizzle |
| Wherefore was I to this keen mockery born? | Why you hatin’ on me? |
| I am that merry wanderer of the night | YOLO |
| A good persuasion | True dat |
| Use me but as your spaniel, spurn me, strike me, neglect me, lose me; only give me leave, unworthy as I am, to follow you | I’ll be your Rhianna if you be my Chris Brown |
| Get thee gone and follow me no more | Bounce, creeper |
| Do not be so bitter with me | Step off my grill |
| Never did mockers waste more idle breath | Talk to the hand |
| You speak not as you think; it cannot be! | Liar pants |
| Minimus (See also dwarf; bead; acorn) | Vertically challenged |
| Full of vexation | Emo |
| Juggler (see also: canker-blossom) | Tool |
| I understand not what you mean by this | Girl, you cray |
| Tarry, rash wonton | Hold up, speedy pants. |
| Cupid is a knavish lad (See also: The course of true love never did run smooth) | Love stinks |
| Lord, what fools these mortals be! | People be trippin’ |